Friendship (I want YOUR feed back!)

I am quoting multiple sources on the topic of "Friendship." After reading them, I have a few questions that I would like you to answer, as I have been pondering the same things.

Dictionary:

Friend |frend|
noun
a person whom one knows and with whom one has a bond of mutual affection, typically exclusive of sexual or family relations.
• a person who acts as a supporter of a cause, organization, or country by giving financial or other help : join the Friends of Guilford Free Library.
• a person who is not an enemy or who is on the same side : she was unsure whether he was friend or foe.
• a familiar or helpful thing : he settled for that old friend the compensation grant.

Thesaurus:

Friend
noun
1 a close friend companion, soul mate, confidante, confidant, familiar, alter ego, second self, classmate, schoolmate, workmate; ally, associate; sister, brother; best friend, kindred spirit, bosom buddy, bosom friend; informal pal, chum, sidekick, crony, main man, mate, buddy, bud, amigo, compadre, homeboy, homegirl, homie; antonym enemy.

Wikipedia:

Friendship is a term used to denote co-operative and supportive behavior between two or more people. In this sense, the term connotes a relationship which involves mutual knowledge, esteem, and affection and respect along with a degree of rendering service to friends in times of need or crisis. Friends will welcome each other's company and exhibit loyalty towards each other, often to the point of altruism. Their tastes will usually be similar and may converge, and they will share enjoyable activities. They will also engage in mutually helping behavior, such as exchange of advice and the sharing of hardship. A friend is someone who may often demonstrate reciprocating and reflective behaviors. Yet for many, friendship is nothing more than the trust that someone or something will not harm them.

Value that is found in friendships is often the result of a friend demonstrating the following on a consistent basis:

-the tendency to desire what is best for the other,
-sympathy and empathy,
-honesty, perhaps in situations where it may be difficult for others to speak the truth, especially in terms of pointing out the perceived faults of one's counterpart,
mutual understanding.

In a comparison of personal relationships, friendship is considered to be closer than association, although there is a range of degrees of intimacy in both friendships and associations. Friendship and association can be thought of as spanning across the same continuum.

Decline of Friendship in America (Wikipedia):


According to a 2006 study documented in the journal the American Sociological Review, Americans are thought to be suffering a loss in the quality and quantity of close friendships since at least 1985.[1] The study states 25% of Americans have no close confidants, and the average total number of confidants per citizen has dropped from four to two.

According to the study...

-Americans' dependence on family as a safety net went up from 57% to 80%
-Americans' dependence on a partner or spouse went up from 5% to 9%
-Research has found a link between fewer friendships (especially in quality) and psychological and physiological regression

In recent times, it is postulated modern American friendships have lost the force and importance they had in antiquity. C. S. Lewis for example, in his The Four Loves, writes:

"To the Ancients, Friendship seemed the happiest and most fully human of all loves; the crown of life and the school of virtue. The modern world, in comparison, ignores it. We admit of course that besides a wife and family a man needs a few 'friends'. But the very tone of the admission, and the sort of acquaintanceships which those who make it would describe as 'friendships', show clearly that what they are talking about has very little to do with that Philía which Aristotle classified among the virtues or that Amicitia on which Cicero wrote a book."

QUESTIONS???
1. What does friendship mean to you? What does friendship feel like?
2. As Christians, are we expected to be friends with all of our brothers and sisters in Christ? Should we be?
3. Do you agree with these definitions and thoughts about the word friend and friendship?
4. What is your reaction to the "Decline of Friendship in America?" Why or why not?
5. Why is friendship easy / difficult?

Everything's Amazing & Nobody's Happy...

Hey everyone! 

Sorry I haven't posted anything within the past few days. I have been really tired and have taken every opportunity I've had to get some sleep. 

Today, I was on Facebook and watched a video that one of my favorite teachers from high school posted. I find it very amusing and thought provoking about our society today. I hope that you enjoy it. I laughed!

These ideas this guy brings up are also things (on a more general basis) that I've been pondering and thinking about while I'm on my fast. 

All the Best!

Josh

God is Faithful

Over the past two days through the exciting, exhausting, and entertaining lock-in and the aftermath (today), I have been encouraged and reminded by the fact that God is faithful. This past week at small group, we talked about God's faithfulness. A few of many verses that were mentioned are:

II Thessalonians 3:3 "But the Lord is faithful, and he will strengthen and protect you from the evil one."

I Corinthians 1:9 "God, who has called you into fellowship with His son Jesus Christ our Lord, is faithful."

And I Corinthians 10:13 "No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, He will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it."

This third verse, I Corinthians 10:13, has been a tremendous encouragement and help to me over the past two days.  The Tribe at Tatesbrook (The Church at Tatesbrook youth group) had a lock-in this Friday night. As the leader, Friday was filled with preparation beforehand and constant supervision and exertion of energy after the lock-in began. When events like this happen and I am having to stay up late at night / be active the entire time, my first instinct is to eat to keep me awake and going. This was very hard for me to deal with because I was low on energy before the lock-in began and bowling wore me out. On top of that, my sense of smell has been going haywire to past few days, and Friday night was no exception. In the bowling alley, I could smell the greasy fries smothered in ketchup and the processed cheese dip with nachos, just to name a few of many favorites... At the church, I could smell chips and salsa, fruit snacks, chocolate chip cookies, Cheetos, Root Beer, popcorn, and cool ranch Doritos... again, just to name a few. Almost everything inside of me wanted to snack and fill this void my stomach contains. However, in those moments of battling with my mind, God remained faithful and kept me strong. He did not allow me to be tempted beyond what I could bear. 

While I know God is faithful in my mind, it's an entirely different experience when God shows His faithfulness in moments when my flesh wants to take over. So, whether we are giving up food, being kind to those we don't necessarily like, or sitting in a time of darkness with no answers... God IS faithful! He will keep His promises. He will see us through to the end of where we have been called. He will lift up our heads when they are down. He will give us strength to walk on. He will guide us through the darkness. He will keep His promise because He is faithful! And as we walk in God's faithfulness, may He receive the glory of which He deserves.

Picture: Old Faithful in Yellowstone National Park

Love is Perfected

Hey Everyone!

Well, it is the beginning of day three on my fast and I am just over 49 hours into it. God has been revealing things that seem simple to me, but they are things that I've never taken the time to realize. For example, for the past two days, I've been reminded of what it feels like to be excluded. Let me preface this by saying that this exclusion has not been intentional. However, eating is something that everyone has in common. Am I right? But when all others eat and you don't, there is a connection or commonality lost. When others are enjoying a "nice" meal, talking about how good the food is, talking about the desserts they will have afterward, and you are sitting there with no food to comment on and no possibility to put your two cents in on what dessert to have... you feel left out. When others feel obligated to avoid eating around you or avoid letting you see the dessert that has been chosen, it is yet another exclusion. In these times however, my thoughts are not to disengage myself from the conversation around me or avoid the sight of food, but rather a want to be involved in the conversation. I know that the avoidance of placing food around me is for my benefit, but that isn't what I want. 

Now, this might be a stretch, but go with me now. This makes me think about how many times I've done the same thing to someone else in a different situation. How many times have I avoided talking to someone because it would be best if I didn't (whether for my benefit to avoid an awkward situation or for their benefit because they want "to be left alone")? I mean really... how many times have I unintentionally excluded someone? Many. It might seem odd, but I struggle with meeting new people and getting to know them. It is a hard thing for me to do. But I realize that this exclusion is based out of my fear and lack of love for some. 

BUT... of this, I am not guilty because of the grace and love that I have from God through Jesus Christ. Because of this love from my Heavenly Father, I am able to move past this and out of that fear. In I John 4:7-12 & 17-19 it says:

"Dear friends, let us love one another, because love is from God, and everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. The one who does not love does not know God, because God is love. God's love was revealed among us in this way: God sent His One and Only Son into the world so that we might live through Him. Love consists in this: not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son to be the propitiation for our sins. Dear friends, if God loved us in this way, we also must love one another. No one has ever seen God. If we love one another, God remains in us and His love is perfected in us... In this, love is perfected with us so that we may have confidence in the day of judgment; for we are as He is in this world. There is no fear in love; instead, perfect love drives out fear, because fear involves punishment. So the one who fears has not reached perfection in love. We love because He first loved us."

The bold part above is a beautiful picture of what Christ has done for us. As children of God, we have that perfect love within us. As children of God, "we are as He (Jesus) is!" We have been made perfect just as Christ is perfect, because of His sacrifice. God has blessed us beyond anything I could think or imagine. 

All of this to say that as the perfect, blameless children of God because of Christ's sacrifice, we have the joy and call to share this perfect love with the world around us and not hoard it for ourselves.

Convicted to love,

Josh

Out with the old... In with the ???

Mah Nishmah? (Hebrew for "What's up?)

So, I thought that I would explain a little bit about this time of prayer and fasting that I begin at midnight tonight. Hopefully, this will give you a better idea of what to pray for. I also want to share a little encouragement about fasting that I received from my doctor on Monday.

I will be fasting from all food. I will only be drinking water, certain types of fruit and vegetable juices, and broth. I am in good health and able to do this fast. Please pray that God will give me strength through this time as I find my reliance on Him and not the things of this world. I am hoping to find spiritual renewal, strengthening of my faith, and wisdom from God. This is an exciting time for me as I am expecting God to reveal Himself as I've never seen before.

For over a month now, I have felt God leading me to do this forty day fast. At first, I continually ignored this call because I thought that I was not able to do such a fast. Through the past month, God has not allowed me to push this aside and move on with life. So, I am answering His call to fast and pray. You see, I love to eat and I love to cook. I also like to think I'm fairly good at both. A vast majority of my interactions have to do with food in some way, shape, or form. It is something I rely on and never give up. It is where I find my energy, comfort, and acceptance. God has convicted me to find these things in Him and no where else. Thus, one of the main reasons I am fasting. The other reason is to find clarity and vision for a mission trip God has called me to in Morogoro, Tanzania. God is asking me to trust Him to provide a vision, opportunities, and finances for this trip (all of which I worry about). Through prayer and fasting, I know God will reveal Himself to me and what He has in store because He has called me to this fast. I'm excited to see what God teaches me and shows me along this journey and hope that you will find encouragement through it as well. 

In Matthew 17: 14 - 21 it says:

When they came to the crowd, a man came up to Jesus, falling on his knees before Him and saying, "Lord, have mercy on my son, for he is a lunatic and is very ill; for he often falls into the fire and often into the water. I brought him to your disciples, and they could not cure him." And Jesus answered and said, "You unbelieving and perverted generation, how long shall I be with you? How long shall I put up with you? Bring him here to me." And Jesus rebuked him, and the demon came out of him, and the boy was cured at once. Then the disciples came to Jesus privately and said, "Why could we not drive it out?" And He said to them, "Because of the littleness of your faith; for truly I say to you, if you have faith the size of a mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there,' and it will move; and nothing will be impossible to you. But this kind does not go out except by prayer and fasting."

My doctor recently talked to me about this scripture while being checked out to make sure that I was healthy. In the New American Standard Bible, it is the only scripture found in the New Testament that mentions both prayer and fasting. From this passage, I see and feel encouraged by the fact that there is power in PRAYER AND FASTING. Jesus knew and understood the impact that these two "Spiritual Disciplines" have on life. I pray that through the next forty days of prayer and fasting that God will do mighty things in and around me. 

I hope that this gives a little insight as to why I will be fasting and what you can pray for me during this time. It is time for me to be "Out with the old... and In with the ???" It is time to find out what that "???" is and see God reveal it. If you have any questions or comments or anything, please feel free to comment on my blog because I would love to talk about these things more!

May the Lamb of God, who was slain, receive the reward of His suffering! Amen!

Josh

All I Need

World on Fire